Here’s How You Can Stop Caring So Much And Start Focusing On Your Success

Here’s How You Can Stop Caring So Much And Start Focusing On Your Success

Trying to embrace the #DGAF mindset?! Me too. Well, at least I was. Over the last few years, I did everything in my power to work on “not caring”. I was attempting failing (as you will see) at being the carefree girl who throws her hair in the wind, throws back shots and dances on tables.

Sound familiar?!

[Insert any aspect part of growing up here] and I’ve probably cared about it, tried not to care…and while focusing so hard on not caring…totally failed at “not caring”.


Let’s get real

My early 20’s were anything but easy. I moved across the country, only to be laid off 6 months later and lose the only friends I had due to a stupid fight. So badly I wanted to be fun and #carefree, the way Instagram made me feel like all my peers were. I felt like if could I do this – success at work, making friends and finding a guy would all fall into place. My older sister is the epitome of this person and I was always so jealous that I couldn’t have her mindset.

Meanwhile, I was never going to be that girl dancing on a table because I can barely have two drinks without getting a hangover. Oh, and I pass out at 9 p.m.

The energy I spent focusing on being #DGAF started taking up sooooo much head space. Riddled with anxiety, I’d constantly wonder…why do I care?! And why do I care about caring?!

This is something I constantly hear friends and other 20-somethings say.

“Why do I care so much?”

“Ugh ,Why do I like him sooo much?”

“Why can’t I just be one of those girls who doesn’t give a f****?!”

Raise your hand if you’ve been personally victimized by trying to embrace the #DGAF mindset.



It took me literally spending days making lists and putting things on the list, like, “stop thinking about [insert grown-up problem here]”, (LOL), that I finally started to come to the realization…maybe being a person who loves to care isn’t so bad?! And maybe I’m particularly ‘type A’, but since the rest of millennials literally had to hashtag and start a movement to “stop caring”, I can’t imagine I’m the only one.

The #DGAF mindset that millennials are constantly trying to embrace isn’t necessarily possible realistic. How can you be ambitious or even survive through any challenge while simultaneously not caring? Is this mindset even real? Or is it just a front we put up on social media?! Is it #fakenews?!

I still have no idea. Maybe I’ll never know. What I do know, is that the #DGAF mindset just isn’t me. And it doesn’t have to be you either.

If your the person who does truly care, you should love yourself for caring so much (link). That’s what makes you…YOU. This might be a part of yourself that you have to learn to love with the outside societal pressures telling you otherwise.

If you know me well, you know I desire to be hugely successful at work. I picture myself managing a team one day and will do whatever it takes to accomplish my goals. I spent a good amount of time wishing I could be like others, stopping work at 5 p.m. to go to Happy Hour, but that’s just not me.

And that’s ok.

IMO, all that matters is that you choose to stand on your own two feet and pick what you truly care about everything. Give yourself the ability to let go AND care – that in itself will truly create something beautiful.

You should love that everyone is different and the fact that you are choosing to care about something is a beautiful quality. Maybe one day, your sense of caring will have a positive impact on others.

Alright, that’s it, I’m officially announcing the #GAF campaign.

What do you choose to care about?! Drop a comment below! 


Related reads:

How I Fell in Love With Myself, and How You Can Too

Ditch Your Boring Routine and Find the Perfect Hobby as a Millennial

12 Signs You are in that Awkward Phase Between 20’s and Adulthood



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Becky

Hi, I’m Becky, a 20-something who is just trying to figure out how to adult! Welcome to T20S, a community of millennials just trying to make adulting suck less. This blog brings real advice for 20-somethings in their careers, finance, budgeting and most importantly…SELF LOVE!

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14 Comments

  1. March 5, 2018 / 12:39 pm

    ahhh i love this!! I’m so with you. I feel like few people actually DGAF. There’s indifference, where it wouldn’t cross your mind, and then there’s actively not GAF which leads to the fact that you DO GAF so much that you’re actively trying not to *queue anxiety crisis* haha I’m with you I do GAF and am happy to. It means i have passions and care about bettering things!

    • Becky Bush
      Author
      March 10, 2018 / 7:48 pm

      I so agree. I feel like it’s more of a “look” than anything else but at least for me, I put so much pressure on it because of those outside forces. I love recognizing that we have passions (and I love reading about yours) 🙂

  2. March 5, 2018 / 2:26 pm

    Feeling all these vibes, girl! Let’s be honest…not many people actually care, so when you do come across people that GAF–it’s refreshing! Granted, I don’t think we should get wrapped up in comparison/GAF to the point where it’s harmful to ourselves, but I do agree that there’s nothing wrong with ACTUALLY caring about something.

    • Becky Bush
      Author
      March 10, 2018 / 7:51 pm

      I love that point of view – it’s true, so many people DON’T care! Which is sad/crazy! There is nothing wrong with actually caring, thanks so much for the positive feels 🙂

  3. March 6, 2018 / 7:08 am

    I relate to this post on so many levels. Personally, I’ve thrown myself into my work and raising my children, and focusing less on what people think of me. I finally realized that I can never please everyone, but I can please myself.

    • Becky Bush
      Author
      March 10, 2018 / 7:51 pm

      I LOVE this and I 100% agree. I hope one day I can completely master that mindset. I’m sure your children (and your work) and are soooo grateful to have a role model with that mindset as well. Not everyone has that!

  4. March 6, 2018 / 7:26 am

    I’m that one person who actually GAF and sometimes I don’t lol. It really depends on the situation. But when I do GAF, my anxiety is always on high alert.

    • Becky Bush
      Author
      March 10, 2018 / 7:51 pm

      Ha ha ha, that’s incredible! I feel like part of knowing that you are just the kind of person who “cares” is part of what makes it less stressful (at least – it did for me)!

  5. March 6, 2018 / 8:33 am

    I TOTALLY feel you on this girl! Over the years though, I’ve learned that sometimes caring “too much” makes us who we are!

    • Becky Bush
      Author
      March 10, 2018 / 7:49 pm

      Yes! I so agree! I care too much about so many things but it’s so amazing and fun just to OWN it! 🙂

  6. March 6, 2018 / 12:18 pm

    It’s not me either. I think there are some things that we shouldn’t care about so much, but lots of things that we totally should care about. Just last week I said to myself “I wish I didn’t care about him so much.” But I think that’s silly – just because you don’t know if I relationship will work out doesn’t mean you should be scared to care. I try to remind myself to live in the present more, and I think that helps me to care about the things that are right in front of me even if I don’t know what will happen with them later on in life.

    • Becky Bush
      Author
      March 10, 2018 / 7:49 pm

      I absolutely love this, I so agree. I think it’s AMAZING to care about things like relationships – you probably wouldn’t want to date/be friends with someone who wouldn’t care, so it’s OK not to embody that quality yourself. 🙂 It’s an amazing beautiful quality as a person!

  7. March 7, 2018 / 6:22 am

    I love this! I feel like since the IDGAF phrase has been coined, it’s given everyone permission to be apathetic towards everything and that bothers me. It’s ok to care too much about things! <3

    • Becky Bush
      Author
      March 10, 2018 / 7:48 pm

      Yes! I agree! 🙂 It’s GREAT to care, it’s an amazing quality.